Home » » Slate jumps on the what-if bandwagon, but with a bash-FNC twist

Slate jumps on the what-if bandwagon, but with a bash-FNC twist

Written By mista sense on Friday, April 28, 2006 | 10:17 AM

Slate's Josh Levin rips off TCG's concept of another reporter behind the White House press podium but adds a singularly unoriginal twist: bashing Fox News by envisioning Bill O'Reilly as WH spokesman:


Q: According to USA Today, the president's approval ratings …

MR. O'REILLY: I have access to secret prisons, OK, secret prisons that are even more secret than those ones in Bulgaria that you think are secret. And these are the kind of places where you have to check the collected works of Karl Marx at the door, because the only ideologue you'll be hanging out with is Helen Thomas.

Q: When will you tell us what you did to Helen?

(CROSS TALK. TASERS.)

MR. O'REILLY: And finally tonight, the mail.

Got a letter here from John Dickerson in Washington, D.C.: "The president has looked back before 9/11 for what mistakes might have been made. After 9/11, what would his biggest mistake be, would you say, and what lessons has he learned from it?"

Hey, Mr. Dickerson, we're running out of time so I have just two words for you: Shut up.

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