Last week we had a really fun time with the video game disses, right? As promised, I compiled some of my faves from the thread (yeah, a couple of 'em are mine; shut up). So, it is with great pride I present to you the Best of SVGL for this week. I didn't have time to tie up everyone's name to the disses they submitted, so if you'd like to claim credit for your own brilliance in the comments section, please feel free to do so.You're so bad at Metroid, you morph into a cube.
You're so bad at Metal Gear Solid, the guards say, "Oh, it's just that guy."
You're so bad at Harvest Moon your wife gave birth to a sheep.
You're so bad at Persona 3, you're always free on Sunday.
You're so bad at Silent Hill 1, you died in the car crash.
You're so bad at Silent Hill 2 that Mary smothered you.
You're so bad at Half-Life, you missed the tram.
You're so bad at FF7, you got a date with your right hand.
You're so bad at Castlevania, you've only whipped cream!
You're so bad at Okami, the townspeople moved to a Bob Ross painting.
You're so bad at Ico, the Shadows started charging Yorda rent.
You're so bad at Minesweeper the game loads with the dead face to save time.
You're so bad at Nintendogs, they subpoenaed your DS for the Michael Vick trial.
You're so bad at Xenosaga, the characters press triangle to skip your gameplay.
You're so bad at Kingdom Hearts, Sora teamed up with Scooby-Doo and Fred Flintstone.
You're so old you blow on the discs to make them work.
You're so bad at Sonic, Sega has hired you to work on the next sequel.
You're so bad at Zork, the grues got tired of eating you.
You're so bad at Knytt, you got stuck at the part with the wall in the way.
You're so lazy you make Valve look punctual.
You're so bad at Kana Little Sister, Kana spent her last days alive playing Bible Black.
You're so bad at Star Wars Rogue Squadron, you might as well be playing Lair.
